Tonight after church, I was talking with my friend Brooke and I noticed her adorable gold sandals. I immediately winced after noticing them as I looked down at my own sandals, brown leather, not the kind of sandals in a petite, fashionable sense, but sandals in the clunky, "makes you think of dirty feet" sense (which mine were not, by the way) and dare I even mention the half painted toes that were sporting nail polish, oh, circa 2005? As I worked my way up, to the jeans that were slightly too tight in all the wrong places, to the too big shirt that I actually thought twice about wearing, but then decided to wear anyway because I knew I would be wearing Hazel in the Baby Bjorn all night and no one would really notice, to the hair that I am not quite sure I brushed today, and the makeup that I put on with my left hand while I was holding Hazel this afternoon, I realized that I had OFFICIALLY let myself go.
Its so easy to hide behind your children, make sure they look good, but then rely on the million excuses that a mom has as to why she looks the way she does. I use the excuse that I just don't have time to do things like paint my toenails, and if I did have a few minutes to myself, I would much rather be blogging about it than actually doing it. I have literally stopped caring all together, and that's dangerous!
But I didn't always used to be this way. A fashionista I have never been, but I did have a few years where I really discovered my own style and took time to dress up when I would go out- I would say my best years were 1999-2005 (SIX years out of 30 isn't so impressive!). But I had kids and that was that. To tell you how bad it has gotten, I do not own not even one pair of dress shoes, not one (unless you count the black crocs that I have that if you are at least 20 feet away and the sun is in your eyes sort of look like ballerina flats).
I think that God wants us to present ourselves better than what I have been doing. Even the famed Proverbs 31 woman wore colorful, high quality clothing. That is not to say our focus should be on our outer appearance, as 1 Peter 3:3 tells us that it should be on "inner self, the unfading beauty of a gently and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's eyes." But as women, let's face it, we just FEEL better when we are wearing something or have styled our hair in a way that makes us feel pretty or special. I know it sounds cheesy, but I know that no woman reading this would disagree. And I really think there is a reason for that and I see nothing wrong with it. Shouldn't we present ourselves, beings that God made and said was good, in a way that is, well, a reflection of the best part of ourselves?
So, here I go. I am not rushing out to buy a new wardrobe (which, sadly, I would need to do if I were going full force here), and really don't want to buy any clothes until I lose some of the baby weight, but I am going to start by learning the art of accessorizing. So if you see me out with my faded, gap outlet 1.99 discount shirt with the undisclosed yellow stain on one sleeve and the baby spit up down the back- be looking, because you might just see a hint of sparkly gold (as in gold COLORED)a bangle on my wrist or maybe my very own gold sandals!